Have You Met Gus?

He's wonderful. A 7 month-old golden retriever with some pit in him, maybe boxer, too? We saw him a few times at the humane society and lucky for us, he was still there once we were ready to bring him home. The first night in our new house, in a freezing cold bedroom with a puppy jumping off the walls... I will admit I had a little buyer's remorse... for a moment for both the dog and the house. But that passed. Gus has really settled down and just seems so happy to be in a home. It's really sweet. We're still working on keeping him off the bed and hopefully eventually he'll stop following me room-to-room like, well, a puppy. But he's been a great addition to the family.

Only Children

When it comes to birth order, the greatest bias is against the "only child." First, please remember, that in birth order the category is actually "only/first." But I digress. I am an only child. Well, kind of. I am my father's only child. I was an only child until a week before my tenth birthday when my mom had my sister (and I was warned, even at that young age, to never call her anything but my sister, because we came from the same womb.) But again, digression. So I identify with the only child. I know, from half of my parents what it is like to be their only child and from the other what it is to be her only child for ten years. And we get a bad rap! Truth be told, I know some terrible only children. But these are only children of intact couples, coddled along through adulthood. There is another kind of only child, the kind who was treated like an adult from a young age. And was expected to operate in an adult world. This is my kind of only child. This isn't the Veruca Salt, "Mommy, I want it NOW!" child. This is the child who learned big words and big concepts early on. This kid had a lot of adult interaction and, yes, was never in the team of kids ganging up on the parents, but had to negotiate for herself. There is no better or worse in birth order... oldest of ten kids and younger of two, it is all about explanation. However, I feel a bit hot sometimes when only children are categorized and dismissed. Because some only children feel very deeply for others and some only children are only the least little like the stereoytpes. And those only children sometimes feel like they've been fighting all the same fights "we" are now fighting, but for decades. So, odds are you know some awesome only children who have been saving your spot in adulthood... we don't need a thank you, just some kinds words the next time the dreaded "only child" comes up....

[Editor's Note: And we're only the least little bit self-righteous, too....]

Shut. Up.

I am going to try to make this one of very few blog posts about bar study. Because it's boring enough for me to do it, no reason to bore my readership as well. But here goes. I'm 4 weeks in. It sucks. I wonder whether I've learned/been reminded of/will retain anything. It's boring as shit, completely overwhelming and I feel like I don't have the time to do it right. Which brings me to my point. Everyone who spent last summer updating facebook statuses bemoaning BarBri... please shut up. I am aware that my situation is nowhere near as tough as it could be. I only have one job I have to be at 45 hours a week. I have no young children. I have (or will again soon) the internet at home. I have a supportive joint tenant with right of survivorship who will do the packing, moving and unpacking so I can study. I would even count it in my favor for only this discrete purpose that said JTWROS isn't home during the week, so I can devote weekday evenings to studying without being tempted to, say, talk to someone. HOWEVER. Having all day every day to study would make things a lot easier. A lot. It would definitely still suck, still be boring and still be overwhelming... but I'd have an extra 9 hours a day to tackle it. And so, with all due respect, I'd like to tell those past people with their June and July belly-aching, to please, please. PLEASE. Just shut up.

And to those who have done this without too much bitching, with jobs, with children, with other pressing life-obligations... my hat is off to you. Because this sucks.

For the Record

Consider this. I am sure that the snowstorm in the midwest is a big deal. I'm sure it's slowing things down and ruining some xmas plans. I mean, I was virtually the last person to land at O'Hare last year before Christmas. I understand. HOWEVER, a couple of weeks ago, Flagstaff received 28 inches of snow in a day. Monday we got another 6. No big deal. You know why? Because the average snowfall in Minneapolis is 49.9 inches. In 1983–1984, Minneapolis set its own record with 98.4 inches. Flagstaff on average receives 100.3 inches of snow a year. Oh, and, "Although snow often covers the ground for weeks after major winter storms, Flagstaff's relatively low latitude and plentiful winter sunshine quickly melt much of what falls, and persistent deep snowpack is unusual. One notable exception occurred during the severe winter of 1915-1916, when successive Pacific storms buried the city under nearly seven feet (2 m) of snow, and some residents were snowbound in their homes for several days." According to Wikipedia. New York City is 28.4. Hartford is 49. Actually, you can devote some serious Christmas Eve work hours to websites like this.
My point is that the next time I relate that the power is out, work is canceled and we have two feet of snow... I hope you, dear readers, reconsider your preconceptions about Arizona and give it the respect it deserves. That situation is not, as the person who may or may not have birthed me said, "a lot for there." Nope, it's just a lot. And although the season has only just started, I am confident that my snowstorm can beat up your "snowmageddon."

Thanks-- and Merry Christmas, again.

Grandma Jane, Revisited

I am thinking a lot about my grandma this season, since this is the first Christmas we've celebrated without her... ever. Probably because of all the Swedish and traditional stuff, but I have especially strong associations with her and Christmas. Making Pepperkaker, the smorgasbord on Christmas eve, even the long-standing family love-hate with lutefisk. She had a sign in her house that said, "All hearts go home for Christmas, for love is always there." So maybe the association comes from her strong feelings about the holiday. She loved having everyone there, playing games, retelling stories-- classics now include the year my uncle misheard the swedish deli guy and boiled the lutefish for 45 instead of "4 to 5" minutes. Very typical family Christmas stuff, but if you haven't had to adjust your traditions yet... enjoy them while they last.
Finally, as I mentioned before, my grandma loved music and dancing. So I leave you, on this Christmas Eve, with a song everyone in the family loves singing at this time of the year. Merry Christmas!

House!

We closed yesterday-- finally! And so we have a house. In preparation, we've been watching lots and lots of HGTV. Um, that channel is deceptive. This was all way more agonizing and complicated than they make it look. Apparently you can't believe everything you see on television. But now it's over! Our realtor and I hugged twice when he dropped off the key...
Last night we had a snowstorm. We took Aberdeen, subway sandwiches and the bottle of wine from the realtor over to the house (the moving is happening actually right now, while I type.) We got giddy, we made plans. We tried to make rules about the number of functional repairs we'll do per cosmetic change. "But... um, painting doesn't count as cosmetic, right??" Charlie teased me for postulating that MAYBE under the carpeting in the other rooms on the first floor, there would be beautiful, pristine hardwood floors like there are in the kitchen and living room. He suggested it's also possible there is gold under the carpeting. We laughed at the weird parts of the house (why does the carpeting in the bedroom make crinkling noises??) and realized we like the kitchen cabinets more than we thought. We experienced a bit of the reality of single-pane windows and no heat source in the master bedroom. We talked islands and banisters and dog gates and patios to barbeque on.
And, at about 9, we went back to our rented house. And made a fire. And watched more HGTV.

Connections

The bar studying started a couple of weeks ago and one of the first topics I covered was Evidence. So Evidence is about what kind of evidence can be used in criminal and civil cases... there are a set of Federal Rules of Evidence which are used in federal court and are kind of the model for most states, then each state has their own rules of evidence which either track or depart from the federal rules. Evidence is full of exceptions and rules and exceptions to the rules. I never felt like I "got" it in law school (um, don't tell anyone that, since I'm like trying to be a trial attorney and all...) and didn't feel like the first pass of bar review changed that.
It reminds me a lot of learning Spanish. I started Spanish class in 3rd grade and continued studying Spanish really through college. And, pathetically, never felt like I "got" it either. Until I studied abroad in Chile. Then, by combining the rules I'd been taught over and over but struggled to apply correctly, with learning language in blocks... I started to "get" it. Instead of debating in my head whether something was preterite or subjunctive, I could take a block of language I knew to be correct and change the verb conjugation from "we" to "he." And so on.
I am thinking Evidence has to be like this. I am going to not stress terribly about my inability to truly "get" it, I just need to "get" it well enough in a couple of months, but I do look forward to a day when I can wow my colleagues with my facility with evidentiary issues.
I wonder what other of life's stumbling blocks are like this, things we can't master until we just do them. They're impossible to learn from books but, like, totally no big deal once we're in the middle of them. I hope lots because as many things seem unattainable these days, I prefer to picture future-me making astute objections in a death-penalty case.... in Spanish.

Chappy Chanukah!

Wintertime

This is the "back" way home after getting out of work at 2:30. It's a old highway that I guess it a dirt road when its not covered with snow. There's been about 2 feet already... and more coming through the night. For now, it's pretty charming.

Overheard at Work

 

"My boyfriend said, 'let's go coyote hunting... oh wait, we can't, it's elk season'"

 

This, apparently, turns out not to be true, as was confirmed by a quick call to a buddy at Game & Fish. Hunt away, friends!

Ten Years?

Hard to believe it's been ten years since high school-- time has gone very fast and very slow. Actually, exactly ten years ago I suppose we were preparing for our first round of college exams. Although when I think about college, especially the first couple of years, I don't remember the school work at all.
Anyway, like our cohort across the country, the Minneapolis Southwest Class of 1999 had our reunion over Thanksgiving weekend. And it was so fun. No, I mean SO FUN. I was looking forward to it already-- not in some weirdo Romy & Michelle way where I was going to finally prove to the world I am a worthwhile person now, afterall (because, let's be honest, pretty sure I was cool then, pretty sure I am cool now.) But the event totally exceeded my expectations. Everyone was so nice and happy to see each other and... adult. Everyone was relaxed and really in the moment, also so nice to see and be a part of. I was so impressed by what people were doing-- thankfully pretty varied but mostly all interesting and pursuing some kind of passion. It was great to see. Interestingly, there are a glut of attorneys in our class, but as far as I could tell, no medical doctors. I guess we can credit Minneapolis Public Schools for turning out cool kids... just not necessarily on its science curriculum.

ps. I may have tried to get two classmates to make out by tapping one on the shoulder, asking if he is single and suggesting he make out with the other one. Erm... some things never change? Go Lakers!